Category Archives: Landlubber’s guide

TftCN: September 19th, Do you know what today is?

Ol’ Chumbucket and Cap’n Slappy, founders of International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

Yarr! Avast, me Hearties! Today is the 17th anniversary of International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

It was in 1995 that John Baur (Ol’ Chumbucket) and Mark Summers (Cap’n Slappy) of Albany, Oregon, proclaimed that each Sept. 19th  is the day when everyone in the world should talk like a pirate.

To help those who are not “fluent” in pirate speak, we have included some pirate phrases to  get ye started.

Pirate Phrases

Aaaarrrr! – This is often confused with “arrrrgh,” which is, of course, the sound you make when you sit on a belaying pin. “Arrrr!”, like “Aloha,” means variously, “yes,” “I agree,” “I’m happy,” “I’m enjoying this beer,” “My team is going to win it all,” “I saw that television show, it sucked!” and “That was a clever remark you or I just made.” And those are just a few of the myriad possibilities of Arrr!

Ahoy, Matey – Hello, my friend!

Ahoy, me Hearties! – the same as saying “Hello, my friends!”

Avast – derived from “hold fast”. Stop and give attention. This word, like many pirate words, has multiple meanings, so it can also can be used in place of, “Whoa! Get a load of that!” “Check it out” or “No way!” or “Get off!”Hey you, stop and check this out! or pay attention

Aye, aye –  “I understand what you said and I will carry out your order!”

Batten down the hatches – put everything away on the ship and tie everything down because a storm is brewing

Bilge rat-The bilge is the lowest level of the ship. It’s loaded with ballast and slimy, reeking water. A bilge rat, then, is a rat that lives in the worst place on the ship. Pirates, just like their modern-day counterparts (regular guys), love to joke and jibe with their buddies. By all means, pirates will call their buddies “bilge rats.”

Booty – Anything of value a pirate can plunder.

Cat O’Nine Tails – a whip with nine strands

Crow’s nest – small platform atop the mast where the lookout stands

Cutlass – short heavy curved bladed sword used by pirates

Davy Jones’ Locker – fabled, mythical place at the bottom of the ocean where the evil spirit of Davy Jones brings sailor and pirates to die.  Where the souls of drowned pirates go.

Dead men tell no tales – phrase indicating to leave no survivors

Doubloons – other coins or found in pirate hoards and stashes

Feed the fish – will soon die

Heave Ho – Put yer back into  it! Give it some muscle and push.

Hempen Halter – a noose for hanging

Hornswaggle – to defraud or cheat out of money or belongings

Jacob’s Ladder – the rope ladder one uses to climb aboard a sloop

Jolly Roger – pirate’s flag including white skull and crossbones over a black field

Keelhaul – A grisly death indeed. The pirate is tied by a rope at the front of the ship at full sail. He is then kicked off and made to drag along the keel, or bottom spine of the ship, usually through the sharp barnacles clinging to the hull. It would act like a cheese grater. “Ye’ll be Keel Hauled!” would strike terror into any pirate.

Lubber –  (or land lubber) Where a lubber is a poor seaman, a land lubber is an exceptionally ignorant seaman.  In a room where everyone is talking like pirates, lubber is always an insult.

Letters of Marque – letters issue from governments during wartime to privateers endorsing the piracy of another vessel

Me – my, I, meself

Mizzen – third mast from the bow of the ship on ships that have three or more masts

Old Salt – an experienced sailor

Pieces of eight – coins or found in pirate stashes

Pillage – rob, sack or plunder

Poop deck – the part of the ship farthest to the back, which is usually above the captain’s quarters.

Run a shot across the bow – warning shot to another vessel’s captain

Saucy – Sexy. “Ye be a Saucy Wench!”

Savvy? – Ok or understand. As in, “Savvy?” meaning “Do you understand”

Scallywag – mild insult akin to rapscallion or rogue

Scurvy – Well, of course, it’s an awful affliction that used to bedevil buccaneers in days gone by; that’s one reason there was lime juice added to the rum in the water, making grog. So calling someone a “scurvy bilge rat” is even worse than calling him a “bilge rat.”

Scurvy dog – the pirate is talking directly to you with mild insult

Scuttle – to sink a ship

Seadog – old pirate or sailor

Shark bait – That fool hardy person who has been pissin’ off the Captain, and will soon be wandering in Davy Jones’ Locker

Shiver me timbers! – comparable to “Holy Crap!” Pirate for “Well, I’ll be” or “Is that so?”. Originating from when a cannon ball hits a ship and the planking shatters into splinters.

Show a Leg! – Phrase to wake up a sailor. “Show a leg!, it be dawn, you scurvy lubber!”.

Smartly – Do something quickly. “Smartly, me lass,” you might say when sending the bar maid off for another round. She will be so impressed she might well spit in your beer.

Thar she blows! – Whale sighting

Three sheets to the wind – someone who is very drunk. One sheet is mildly drunk and four sheets is passed out.

Walk the plank – punishment in which person walks off a board jutting over the side of the ship while at sea. The consequence is drowning and a visit to Davy Jones’ Locker.

Weigh anchor and hoist the mizzen! – pull up the anchor and the sail and let’s get going

Wench – Woman, girl, or waitress. It can also refer to a peasant girl.

Yardarm – Not just convenient framework to hang the sails, but often times used as a holding post for the disobedient ol’ salts, as in, “Tie that dawg to the yardarm”.

Ye – you

Yo Ho Ho – Whoo Hoo!  A cheerful exhortation to demand attention


TftCN: Saint Patrick’s Day brought to you by Pirates?!?

Saint Patrick’s Day brought to you by Pirates?!?

As Saint Patrick’s Day approaches, most of us prepare our green clothing, Irish food, and of course drink. Be it a green milkshake for the wee lads and lass, or something with a bit more BITE for the adults.  And if asked what we are celebrating most people will tell you. It’s St. Paddy’s day!  If asked for more information most people would tell you that St. Patrick was famous for driving all the snakes out of Ireland and into the sea. (Though most historians think this may not be real snakes, as much as “metaphorical” evil)  But what you may not know is that Patrick was born the son of a wealthy family, and way back, in the year 389 A.D., as a sixteen year old boy, he was kidnapped by Celtic pirates and taken to sell for a slave in Northern Ireland. Though after 7 years he escaped his captivity to return home, he became a priest / bishop and returned to Ireland. In an effort to convert as many of the Irish as he could to Christianity, he did his many wondrous deeds, whether real or metaphorical. But in a way it could be said that none of this would have been possible if not for the Pirates who brought him to Ireland in the first place.

Okay..  so it is a BIT of a stretch, but tomorrow while you are enjoying the festivities and celebrating Saint Patrick’s Day, take a moment to utter a “Yarr!” and raise a toast for the Pirates who made this day  possible.


TGIF! Have a happy and safe holiday! See you  next week.

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Posted by on March 16, 2012 in Landlubber's guide


TftCN: New Year’s Resolutions 2012

Happy New Year! Welcome to our first issue of Tales from the Crow’s Nest for 2012.  Todays article is simply about New Year’s Resolutions.


A New Year’s resolution is a commitment that a person makes to one or more personal goals, projects, or the reforming of what we consider a bad habit. A key element to the New Year’s Resolution that sets it apart from other resolutions is that it is made in anticipation of the New Year and new beginnings. People committing themselves to a New Year’s resolution generally plan to do so for the whole following year. We all do it. On January  1st for some reason anything seems possible. And yet for many of us in the muggle world, our “Shiny” good intentions often fall by the wayside as time goes forward long before the year has ended. Sure there are those who make the commitment and follow through.  So what are they doing that is different?

Many experts suggest that there are certain actions we can take which will assist us in having better results. 

1)      Be realistic. Set goals that are achievable. For instance: Making the resolution to be ruler of the universe, slightly doubtful. However training your parrot to call you ruler of the universe… well SURE …this COULD  happen.

2)      Be concise and specific.  ( My parrot must go with me everywhere I  go and say “Tempest is the ruler of the universe.”)

3)      Break down Large goals into smaller ones.                                                                                                                                                     Large goal: Training my parrot to call me ruler of the universe. Smaller goals. A) Buy parrot  B) convince parrot not to eat my face C) begin to train parrot to speak without calling me bad names… Etc

4)      Make a plan.  (Buy Captain Ahab’s pirate book of parrot training and read what is entailed. Talk to  the other Captains in the fleet. Find out how long it took them to train their parrots)

5)      Above all, aim for things that are truly important to you, not what you think you ought to do or what others expect of you.  (After doing the research, you  change your mind and decide to create a virtual pet monkey on your iphone, who has Johnny Depp’s voice and not only calls you  master of the universe. But also sings and dances for you when your phone rings.)

 Well I  guess it is the thought that counts. 😉

Happy New Year everyone.  Next week we will bring you the story of the lovely Daphne Tart N Sweet. See you then.

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Posted by on January 6, 2012 in Landlubber's guide


TftCN- Landlubber’s guide- Butter Pecan Cheesecake with Chocolate glaze

 This recipe was originally found via Betty Crocker though it can be modified to use dark, or white chocolate, or even use a Graham cracker crust instead . But here is the original recipe.  I  hope  you enjoy it. 🙂


Butter Pecan Cheesecake with Chocolate glaze

 Prep time 30 mins

Total time 8:05

Makes 16 servings






1     cup Gold Medal all purpose flour

1/2 cup butter or margarine, softened

1/2 cup finely chopped pecans

1  tablespoon powdered sugar

Filling and Topping

3 packages (8 oz each) cream cheese, softened

1 cup packed brown sugar

4 eggs

1/2 teaspoon butter flavoring, if desired

1 teaspoon vanilla

1/2 cup semisweet chocolate chips

1/4 cup whipping (heavy) cream

1  tablespoon packed brown sugar

1 tablespoon butter or margarine

1/2 cup pecan halves


Step 1      Heat oven to 400°F. In medium bowl, beat all crust ingredients with electric mixer on low speed until crumbly. Pat dough in bottom and 1 1/2 inches up sides of ungreased 9-inch springform pan. Bake about 7 minutes or until golden brown. Cool 5 minutes.

Step 2   Reduce oven temperature to 325°F. Beat cream cheese in large bowl with electric mixer on medium speed until smooth. Beat in 1 cup brown sugar until creamy. Beat in eggs, butter flavoring and vanilla, scraping bowl occasionally, until smooth. Pour into partially baked crust.

Step 3  Bake about 1 hour 10 minutes or until center is almost set. Cool 15 minutes (center will sink slightly).

 Step 4   Meanwhile, heat chocolate chips and whipping cream in 1-quart saucepan over low heat, stirring constantly, until melted and smooth. Spread chocolate glaze on top of cheesecake.

 Step 5     Heat 1 tablespoon brown sugar, 1 tablespoon butter and the pecan halves in 8-inch nonstick skillet over low heat, stirring frequently, until sugar is melted and pecans are toasted. Spread on waxed paper; cool 5 minutes. Arrange sugared pecans along edge of top of cheesecake. Cool 2 hours at room temperature. Refrigerate 4 hours or overnight. Run metal spatula along side of cheesecake to loosen; remove side of pan. Store covered in refrigerator.

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Posted by on November 23, 2011 in Landlubber's guide


TftCN- Landlubber’s guide- Cranberry Salad

Today’s holiday recipe  was donated by TK from the Nautilus.

Cranberry Salad





1 lb (appx. 1 – 1/2 bags) of fresh Cranberries 

2   Red apples (cored)

1  can of Pinapple chunks

2 cups granulated sugar

2 boxes Raspberry jello

3 cups Hot water


Grind 1 lb. of cranberries (about 1- 1/2 bags of the whole cranberries) and 2 cored apples. Add 2 cups sugar and stir until dissovled. Add 1 regular #2 sized can of pineapple, juice and all. Dissovle 2 boxes of rasberry jello into 3 cups of hot water. Mix together and put in an oblong cake pan (I always just use a really big bowl – or two because it makes a lot!) chill until set (several hours – or overnight)


Stay  tuned tommorrow for Butter Pecan Cheesecake with Chocolate glaze.

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Posted by on November 22, 2011 in Landlubber's guide


TftCN- Landlubber’s guide- Black Bean Brownie Recipe

In preparation for Thanksgiving we have had several  Rogues donate some of thier favorite recipes to share with you. This one was donated by Ret. Madam Cricket,  I am told though the ingredients sound rather strange they are quite delicious. This recipe was originally found via Food Network. Enjoy.


Black Bean Brownies

Butter, for greasing pan
3/4 cup cooked black beans
1/2 cup vegetable oil, or olive oil
2 eggs
1/4 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
2/3 cup sugar
1 teaspoon instant coffee or espresso
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/2 cup mini chocolate chips, divided
1/3 cup flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup confectioners’ sugar, for dusting
Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Grease a 9 by 9-inch square baking pan.

In a blender, puree the beans with the oil. Add the eggs, cocoa, sugar, coffee, and vanilla. Melt half the chocolate chips and add to the blender. Blend on medium-high until smooth. In a small bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, and salt. Add to the blender and pulse until just incorporated. Stir in the remaining chocolate chips. Pour into the prepared pan. Bake until the surface looks somewhat matte around the edges and still a bit shiny in the middle, about 20 minutes. Let cool at least 15 minutes before cutting and removing from the pan. Dust with confectioners’ sugar and serve.

Cook’s Note: Place a small cutout or stencil on the brownie before dusting to make a design.

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Posted by on November 21, 2011 in Landlubber's guide